panic time!

So, I'm planning on leaving my bar job next month for the joys and terrors of running my own business and being my own boss. I'm TERRIFIED, but I'm also confident that I can make this work. I'm comfortable with my pricing, my items are different than anything else I've seen in the local markets, but more than anything it's the feeling I get when I sit down to a table full of new supplies. It's this overwhelming joyous contentment, the fact that no matter what I have to do later or tomorrow, I have several hours with my tools and at the end of those hours I will have created new art, something that someone out there has been waiting and waiting to find.

The past few years have shown me that I'll never be truly happy working under another person. I have too much pride and stubbornness and too little regard for authority. I know I have the drive and discipline to make this happen, but it might be a struggle. If it was just me, I might not be so worried, but doctor boyfriend hasn't been making a bundle of money at his job and I'm doing a lot of the bill-paying and food-buying these days.

I figure I'll need to clear 600 a week, gross, to net enough to live on. When I've done these markets in the past I've made anywhere from 40 to 300 dollars in a day, with less-than desirable tent spots and an equally iffy booth setup. it's an incredibly variable venue, but things can only get better with improved displays, and I'd like to double my inventory. I waver madly back and forth between doubt, panic, and confidence that i really CAN do this, that I can be my own boss at 24 and be happy and fulfilled doing what I love. Even if I fail miserably and have to crawl back to the bar industry, I'll know that I did my best, and that I learned enough to try again when the opportunity presents itself. 

I like em, so sue me

 

 Maybe it's because life has been getting monotonous lately, what with being completely broke, disliking the day job and sharing one car between two employed people, but I've been craving the most mushy, emotional, cheesy chick flicks known to man. Some movies guaranteed to squeeze a few tears out of me:

 

 The number of people who have never seen this astonishes me. One of the best animated movies ever. It's not just about a silly unicorn, there's all kinds of deep profound stuff like the nature of truth and lies, and, uh, a witch's face gets eaten by a Harpy. Don't worry, she totally deserves it. Pssst.... http://www.blackphoenixalchemylab.com has released a glorious set of perfumes based on the Last Unicorn! BE EXCITED!

I'd always loved Cinderella and I think this is a lovely retelling. Costuming is all just beautiful, I've always liked Drew Barrymore, and Angelica Huston does a wonderful job being an AWFUL person. The part where she throws the chicken at Prince Henry is pretty freaking amusing, i always giggle a little.

 Ok, yeah, I know. But it's all so PRETTY. And sparkly. And there's a seductive elephant, and John Leguizamo is a lovely little Toulouse Lautrec, and Jim Broadbent and Richard Roxburgh do pretty much the best version of 'Like a Virgin' ever. I was a kind person and looked it up for you, Here you go.   I even liked Nicole Kidman's pompous self in this.

I remember reading this in school back in 6th or 7th grade and being completely humiliated that I cried a little... it's just such a sweet, sad story and as moving at 24 as it was at 11. The movie does a really good job of capturing the same feel; the characters are perfect and the scenery is beautiful. Parts get a little cheesy but what is teen romance if not cheesy?



Oh, and if anyone has any good suggestions, especially things I can watch online or on netflix, fess up.